kepercayaan dan komitmen = awet?

dulu gw meyakini dua rumus itu untuk mempertahankan suatu hubungan.
tapi sekarang, ntah kenapa gw mencoret rumus kepercayaan.
mungkin bisa dibilang gw marah. gw sedikit trauma. gw dendam. sama makhluk bernama lelaki.
khianat, bohong, selingkuh, gw pernah jadi korban itu semua.
dan rasanyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa......
ampun sakit hati banget!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
kalo nginget-nginget pengen banget gw gampar tu orang yang udah ngelakuin itu semua sama gw, gw cabik-cabik mukanya, gw tonjok!

sampe sekarang, gw cukup mengurangi kadar kepercayaan gw sama orang berjenis lelaki.
yaaa gw ga akan percaya 100% LAGI sama lelaki kecuali sama suami gw ntar, cailah haha..
susah banget rasanya bisa percaya sama laki, walaupun orang itu udah ngelakuin apapun untuk bikin gw percaya.

mau cowo kek, mau pria kek, tetep aja itu lelaki kan?!
tabiatnya ga beda jauh lah. *menurut gw
susah bo' nyari lelaki yang bener-bener lelaki.
yang bisa ngehargain wanita, yang ga ngeremehin wanita.
sahabat gw ada yang bilang, "tidak semua laki-laki, bersalah pada dirimu....", itu lirik lagu kan ya..
emang bener sih apa yg dia bilang, tapi tetep ajaaaaaaaaa..

gw tau klo suatu hubungan tanpa rasa percaya, jadinya ga sehat, bawaan curigaaa mulu', sering berantem, dan itu identik dengan protektif.
tapi untungnya gw bukan tipe cewe yang protektif juga, karena gw juga ga suka pasangan gw protektif sama gw.
tapi kadang, rasa ga percaya itu ga bisa gw kontrol, kadang suka nuduh yang ngga-ngga, suka curigaan, dan ujung-ujungnya berantem, pastinya itu bikin hubungan jadi ga enak untuk beberapa saat.

tapi gw yakin, rasa percaya gw sama lelaki bakal balik dengan sendirinya, gw cuma butuh waktu, bukti dan keyakinan, gw ga butuh paksaan dan tekanan.
gw yakin itu.
yakin banget.

Hey there delilah by Plain White

hey there delilah by plain white

Hey there Delilah
What’s it like in New York City?
I’m a thousand miles away
But girl tonight you look so pretty
Yes you do
Times Square can’t shine as bright as you
I swear it’s true

Hey there Delilah
Don’t you worry about the distance
I’m right there if you get lonely
Give this song another listen
Close your eyes
Listen to my voice it’s my disguise
I’m by your side

Oh it’s what you do to me
Oh it’s what you do to me
Oh it’s what you do to me
Oh it’s what you do to me
What you do to me

Hey there Delilah
I know times are getting hard
But just believe me girl
Someday I’ll pay the bills with this guitar
We’ll have it good
We’ll have the life we knew we would
My word is good

Hey there Delilah
I’ve got so much left to say
If every simple song I wrote to you
Would take your breath away
I’d write it all
Even more in love with me you’d fall
We’d have it all

Oh it’s what you do to me
Oh it’s what you do to me
Oh it’s what you do to me
Oh it’s what you do to me

A thousand miles seems pretty far
But they’ve got planes and trains and cars
I’d walk to you if I had no other way
Our friends would all make fun of us
and we’ll just laugh along because we know
That none of them have felt this way
Delilah I can promise you
That by the time we get through
The world will never ever be the same
And you’re to blame

Hey there Delilah
You be good and don’t you miss me
Two more years and you’ll be done with school
And I’ll be making history like I do
You’ll know it’s all because of you
We can do whatever we want to
Hey there Delilah here’s to you
This ones for you

Oh it’s what you do to me
Oh it’s what you do to me
Oh it’s what you do to me
Oh it’s what you do to me
What you do to me

*i love this song as people who keep their long distance relation.

KEBALIK-BALIK

EMANG SEMUANYA KEBALIK-BALIK
ADA YANG BUTUH, ADA YANG GA BUTUH
ADA YANG GA BUTUH, ADA YANG BUTUH
TERUS AJA BEGINI
EMANG SUKANYA BEGINI

WEEEESSSS MUMEEET!!
SA'KAREPKU WEESSSS

ada yang baru!

eh eh gw mau share nih, ada yang lucuu.
kemarenkan gw ke kampus yaaa, niatnya mau jual pin sama stiker gitu deehh ke maba, yaa salah satu cara buat nambah biaya event tahunan kampus juga hehe.
naahh sambil nunggu standnya, gw lirik liriklah tu ke anak anak baru haha, mau ngeksisss! cailaah haha.

gw sama beberapa temen gw pada sibuk ngomongin maba yang keliatan eye catching gitu deh!
ada cewe yang (katanya) eksiiiiiiisssssss bangeeeetttt sampe katanya sejogja pada tau dia gitu, buset dah..
ada cowo lucu gitu, badan oke, muka bersih, kulit putih eeehhhh tapi ngondekkkk booookk xp
ada lagi yang belom apa-apa udah cinlok alias cinta lokasi, ckckck dasar anak muda!
ada lagi cowo yang mukanyaaaa sumpah kaga bo'ong, jadul bangettt!! malah ada temen gw yang ngira dia bapak rektorlah, bokapnya maba lahh!
nah ada lagi ni satu, niatnya mau jadi anak gaoool geto dehh (najis bgt gw!), tapi malah keliatan laylaykulay jiahahahaaaa..
yang paling sensasional ada yang dibilang mirip aura kasih!
seeeettttt daaaaahhhhh cuma sama warna rambut doaaanggg!! ckckckck ada ada aja ni..

lucu lucu banget ngeliat maba, jangan jangan dulu pas gw jadi maba digituin juga ya sama kk angkatan hahaha paraaahh!

yaaa welcome to fisipol aja deh yaaaa buat mabaaa 09..

moody vs egoist

when this behave came and made everything worst, i know i did some mistakes
but this is me
i don't ever know when it come and how to handle it
i'm just try to make everything walk on the right way
gw belajar dari pengalaman.
gw tau ini buruk tapi mau gimanaa.
just let the time make it changed

untitled

this part is the hardest thing. i don't know why, really really don't know.
when i said that i really miss someone, really love someone, and want to make a serious feeling in my relation, i feel like my relation's partner feel opposite that i feel.
but when i want to break up what i feel, my relation's partner make something that can make sure me that he really really love me.
that's ALWAYS happen to me.
i really hard to make special feelin with someone called man.
there are many mans want to make something closer with me *yeah i think hehe*, but it's really difficult to make same feelin with them.
when i know that i love someone, it's really different.
usually the man who i loved doesn't feel same with me.
dissapointed? of course! confused? absoluttely!
now it's happen to me AGAIN. why? that's a big question.
i feel really really angry now. why? that's a big question too.
aaarrrggghhhh....
so sick and so shit!
yeaah.. so what i supposed to do?
make it break? nooooo, that's not a better solution i think.
so what?? aaarrrgggghhhh don't make me angry please, i know you feel the same like i feel, maybe much than what i feel.
yessss i try to make it deep AGAIN, and i wish you can make me sure.